So that last rant of mine stemmed from this phrase that's been at the tip of my tongue ever since Joey started showing his true colors.
"He's all boy!"
How I hate, hate, hate that phrase! Yet I've nearly said it on countless occasions recently. Aargh.
Yes, he's action-packed and busy and into things (or, better put, things go into him, as he puts EVERYTHING he can get his hands on in his mouth). But what kind of stereotype does that place on him? Would he then feel that because he's a boy, he's not supposed to have his quiet, reflective days? And what does that very loaded phrase mean for naturally quiet and reflective boys? That they're somehow less of a boy just because they prefer to sit back and take things in? That's a lot of pressure to put on a kid who's not even a year old!
I've known my share of quiet boys and I've known quite a few rambunctious girls. Both types of kids are perfect representatives of their gender. We, as the adults in their lives who are blessed (or burdened) with the gift of passing on our cultural inheritance have got to watch the flip remarks we make about our kids. They listen.
I can gaurantee that a flip comment of "you're all boy!" is a much more loaded statement to the child that heard it than it was to the adult that issued it.
I just hope that we make it equally obvious to our young listeners that it's also a good thing for boys to be quiet and reflective, or even--gasp!--cry, and that girls can be perfectly girly when they're running around like Wild Things.
And man, oh, man, I'm afraid that is a challenge sometimes.
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